The Homeowner’s Emotional Roller Coaster

The Homeowner’s Emotional Roller Coaster, a surprisingly accurate map of how a build feels, from ‘dreaming’ to ‘last door knob’ to ‘move in.

Why your remodel feels like a thrill ride, and how to keep your lunch where it belongs

If you’ve ever remodeled a house, or built one from scratch, you already know the dirty little secret of residential construction, it’s not just a project, it’s an emotional endurance event with receipts.

That’s what this graph is getting at. The “Homeowner’s Emotional Roller Coaster” is funny because it’s true, and it’s true because homes are personal. You’re not renovating a spreadsheet. You’re renovating the place where you drink coffee, argue about paint colors, raise kids, host Thanksgiving, and occasionally stare at the wall at 2:00 a.m. wondering why you ever thought “custom” was a good idea.

So let’s walk through the ride, stage by stage, and talk about what’s normal, what’s preventable, and what we do at Smollen The Builder to keep the highs honest and the lows short.

The pre construction high

“We’re doing it, this is going to be amazing.”

Design and early planning is the honeymoon. You’re dreaming, collecting inspiration, talking to architects and designers, and imagining a new life where everything fits, everything works, and nobody has to shim a door ever again.

Then come working drawings. Still exciting, but you start noticing that every decision has ten decisions inside it. Door swings, outlets, grout, appliance specs, trim reveals, lighting plans, mechanical routes, and suddenly you’re having opinions about things you never knew existed.

Bids show up, and the mood dips. That number, it’s always bigger than the number you were picturing in the shower.

Then you sign the contract, and the mood can dip again, because commitment is romantic until it’s legally binding.

What helps here

• Lock the scope before you lock the price.

• Make finish selections early, not because we love paperwork, but because late selections turn into late deliveries, and late deliveries turn into late nights.

• Build a contingency you can live with. Not a fantasy number. A real one.

The “we started” high

“They’re here, progress is happening, I can see it.”

Demolition is cathartic. Things are coming out, old problems are getting exposed, and it feels like momentum.

Then you hit the structural sprint, footings, rough framing, roof deck, windows, and this is peak morale. The house starts looking like something again. Neighbors slow down to stare. You take photos. You begin referring to rooms by their new names.

What helps here

• A clear schedule, and a clear communication rhythm. Weekly check ins beat daily panic.

• Early field verification. Nothing ruins framing joy like discovering a “minor” plan discrepancy that’s suddenly a major conversation.

The long, confusing middle

“Why does it feel like nothing is happening, and why is my bank account sweating.”

Welcome to the part of the project where progress is real, but not photogenic.

This is rough ins, plumbing, electrical, heating, inspections, insulation. The work is critical, and it’s mostly inside walls, under floors, and behind ceilings, which means it doesn’t look like progress. It looks like a mess that costs money.

Then drywall shows up, and you get a brief lift, because surfaces feel like civilization.

And then comes the emotional pothole, drywall sanding. It’s dusty, repetitive and loud. This is where plenty of homeowners wonder if moving to a yurt would be simpler.

What helps here

• Know that the “invisible work” is where good buildings are made.

• Keep your decision making tidy. Changes in this phase are the most expensive kind, because they require backing up.

• Expect a little mess. Plan for air filtration, protection, and proper containment, it’s not optional if you want to keep the rest of your life functioning.

The “extras” moment

“I thought we decided this already.”

Somewhere in the middle, or near the end, reality taps you on the shoulder with a clipboard. This is the bills for extraspart of the graph.

Extras happen for three main reasons:

1. Hidden conditions, old houses are full of surprises, some charming, some expensive.

2. Client driven changes, totally normal, you see it in the real space and you refine.

3. Upgrades, because once you’re in it, you often want to do it right.

The problem isn’t that extras exist. The problem is when they arrive as a surprise.

What helps here

• Transparent change order process, clear pricing, clear documentation, no fog.

• A running budget log you can actually understand.

• A team that talks early, not after the fact.

The finish line surge

“Now it looks like the dream again.”

Then it happens. The house turns the corner.

Trim and cabinets go in, and suddenly the space feels intentional. Tile starts making rooms look finished. Painting brings the calm back. Plumbing fixtures show up and you can finally wash your hands like a modern person.

Then the home stretch, finished electrical, flooring, and the mythical “last door knob,” the final tiny piece that somehow takes three trips to the hardware store and two separate conversations.

And then, the final high, move in day. You’re tired, proud, and slightly suspicious that it went this well.

What helps here

• Punch lists that are organized, prioritized, and actively managed.

• A builder who closes strong, because the last 10 percent is where reputations are made.

How we smooth the ride at Smollen The Builder

We can’t promise you’ll never feel the dip. If anyone promises that, they’re selling something.

But we can keep you off the wildest version of the ride by doing a few things well, every time:

• Clear pre construction planning, scope, schedule, allowances, selections, and a realistic contingency.

• Hands on management, the job gets supervised, not just visited.

• Tight communication, regular updates, straight answers, no disappearing acts.

• Quality control, especially at the invisible stages, because that’s the stuff you live with.

• A calm, practical process, the goal is progress without drama.

A quick note for fellow modern, mid century, and Eichler homeowners

If you own a modernist home, or an Eichler, you already know these buildings reward care and punish shortcuts. Clean lines mean details matter. Exposed structure means planning matters. And doing it right means coordinating trades like you’re conducting an orchestra that occasionally shows up late and asks where to park.

That’s our wheelhouse. We build and remodel modern homes, we do high detail work, and we make custom cabinetry and millwork in our own shop. When the job calls for precision, we show up with tape measures, patience, and a deep respect for the line.

Want help keeping your remodel sane?

If you’re considering a remodel or new build in Marin County, or you’re in the early “this is going to be amazing” phase, let’s talk before the roller coaster clicks into gear.

You can reach us through the contact form at SmollenTheBuilder.com, or call, and we’ll set up a conversation that’s practical, honest, and free of hype.

Because the best projects don’t avoid emotions, they just keep them from driving the truck.